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Regulations For Hunting Attorneys

 Bill to Regulate the Hunting and Harvesting of Attorneys 

 370.01 Any person with a valid in-state rodent or snake hunting         
license may also hunt and harvest attorneys for recreational and  sport
(non-commercial) purposes.

 370.02 Taking of attorneys with traps or deadfalls is permitted.  The
of United States currency as bait, however, is  prohibited.

 370.03 The willful killing of attorneys with a motor vehicle is
 prohibited, unless such vehicle is an ambulance being driven in
 reverse.  If an attorney is accidentally struck by a motor   vehicle,
dead attorney should be  removed to the roadside,   and the vehicle
proceed immediately to the nearest   car  wash.

 370.04 It is unlawful to chase, herd or harvest attorneys from a   power
boat, helicopter or aircraft.

 370.05 It is unlawful to shout, "WHIPLASH", "AMBULANCE", or  "FREE
for the purposes of trapping attorneys.

 370.06 It is unlawful to hunt attorneys within 100 yards of BMW,
 Mercedes  or Porsche dealerships, except on Wednesday afternoon.

 370.07 It is unlawful to hunt attorneys within 200 yards of
 courtrooms, law libraries, health clubs, country clubs,   hospitals or

 370.08 If an attorney gains elective office, it is not necessary    to
have a license to hunt, trap or possess the same.

 370.09 It is unlawful for a hunter to wear a disguise as a   reporter,
accident victim, physician, chiropractor or tax  accountant for the
of hunting attorneys.

 370.10  Bag and Possession Limits per day: Yellow-bellied
 sidewinders, 2; Two-faced tortfeasors, 1;  Back-stabbing divorce
 litigators, 3; Horn-rimmed cut-throats, 2; Minutiae-advocating
 dirtbags, 4. Honest Attorneys protected (Endangered Species  Act).

 ARS 8007.21 It is illegal to take attorneys with a moving   vehicle
unless there are no measurable skid marks at the kill  site.

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