By Al Giovetti
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Monty Python's Complete Waste of Time Walkthrough
Monty Phython's Complete Waste of Time (CWOT)
Warning: this file contains solutions!
- First you must play Spot the Loony, the Loony Announcer will give you
some clues. After the Announcer tells you to "Pay attention to everything
you see", the bird man will fly out of the picture frame. Do not shoot him
so you are sent to the Penalty Box. After you have watched the skit about
the Spanish Inquisition you are ready to find the door. The door is located
by the picture frame, by the bar where the ant walks. Scan the area with
your mouse until you see the tip of the door. Click on the door, then on
the sign that says "Enter Here"
- Go: Right, Right, Straight, Right, Left, Left you will now be asked the
Trivia Questions. [see Solutions bellow]
- Now that you answered the 4 questions you have the letters MPFC on the
left side of your dashboard. Exit the maze and play one more game of Spot
the Loony. When the Loony Announcer tells you to enter the letter "R" press
the letter "R" on your keyboard. The Loony Announcer will be trying to tell
you something, but the cat has got his tongue (not this cat). What he is
trying to tell you is to press the letters you got from the maze. So on
your keyboard press the letters MPFC. You have now completed this lobe.
- The door is located in the TV. It is right after the program about
Tchaikovsky. You can change programs by either clicking on the knob on the
telly or by using Pythonvision. Pythonvision is accessed by clicking on the
right button on the telly. To get to the door with Pythonvision scroll down
to the Exploding Penguin and then click on it.
- When you enter this maze the first thing you have to do is turn around.
Now go: Left, Straight, Left, Right, Straight, Right, Straight, Right. Now
you have to turn around to get the Trivia Questions. [see
- Now is the time to blow up everything on the mantle and on the top of the
TV. You will blow up a total of 10 thingys, 9 on the mantle and the dish on
the T.V. When you have blown up the 10 thingys the announcer will come on
the T.V. and tell you, "And it's just gone 8 o'clock and time for the
penguin on the top of your television set to explode." This is your clue to
set the bomb which will come out of the back of the chair. You need to
click on the bomb to extend it. When the bomb is extended you may enter the
numbers you got from the maze, to do this click on each number until you
have the number you want. After you have entered the number, click on the
clock. BAM one fried Penguin. You are now finished with that lobe.
- To find the door click on the picture of the Larch tree. You need to
click around the middle of the trunk.
- The first thing you must do is turn around. Now go: Right, Straight,
Left. You will now be taken on a roller coaster ride to the top of the
"L". Now go Right, Left, Left, Right, Right. There are the Trivia
Questions. [see Solutions bellow]
- Exit the maze and watch The Money Programme. Pick up the coin that landed
on the floor and place it in the coin slot. The picture will now change to
a slot machine, pull the lever. The object is to put the pictures from the
maze in order on the slot machine windows. You do this by clicking on the
window when that picture comes up. Easy right? What you have 4 pictures
and only three slot windows, this could be a problem!? THINK!! OK I'll tell
you. The first 3 pictures go in the first three windows, when this is done
correctly the windows will start changing pictures again, set the middle
window to the 4th picture.
- First you must get rid of the Whizzo Banners. To do this click on them in
the following order:
- left purple banner with yellow letters
- yellow banner with black letters
- middle lavendar banner with purple letters
- right purple banner with yellow letters
- white banner with blue letters
- The pinball game will start up, click on the off button to get rid of it
for now. The door is in the middle back arch, just above the cross bar and
a little to the left.
- After entering the maze go: Left, Left, Left, Straight, Left, Left, you
are now on the top of the "I" and there is a lift. Take this lift up. This
lift will bring you to the middle of the left side of the letter "B". Go:
Straight, Left. You are now at the bottom right of the "B". There is a lift
for you to take up. This lift will take you to the upper left corner of the
"A". Now go: Left, Right, and take this lift up. You are now going down the
first "L", you will see a lift, take it up. This lift will take you to the
last "L" going down. Turn Left. You will now see a sign that reads, "Pay
attention to Everything" Eric will start doing his imitation of a trombone.
Listen to him until he is finished. When Eric is done you will get the
Trivia Questions. [see Solutions bellow]
- Let's play a little Pin Ball! The object is to hit the four essential
clues in order. To do this do not use the flippers, but use your mouse
pointer which has now turned to cross-hairs. Click on the icons in order and
do not click on any other icons. After doing this correctly the pin ball
machine will disappear. A plane will fly through the window and drop a bomb.
Click on the bomb to release the foot.
Test Your Skills
- Go to the Gopher Game. Play the game and watch for the door to pop out of
the lower left hole.
- After entering the maze turn around. Now go: Straight, Right, Right,
Straight, Left, Left. Now turn around and take this lift down. The lift has
taken you to the lower right leg of the letter "A". Turn around, Eric will
tell you "I see you got the hang of it". Take this lift down. You are now
on the word MOLE on the bottom of the left leg of the "M". Now go: Right,
Right, Left, Left, Right, Right, Left, Straight, Straight, Straight. Now
look what you have done, the bloody maze is stuck. Keep clicking on the
track until it starts up again. Now go: Left, Straight, Right. See that red
button hanging in space? Click on it and you will be taken for a ride to
the Trivia Questions. [see Solutions bellow]
- You now have the 4 essential clues one of which is the madwomen with the
hammer, with the words 1st across her. The other clues are numbers. You
need to play the games in this order: The Gopher Game (play until you reach
the first number), The Pig Game (play until you obtain the 2nd number as
your score) and The Bird Game (play this so your score is the same as your
last number). Once you have completed these games the 3 sub lobes and the
Test Your Skill lobe will be flashing.
- There are two ways to find this door. After the Pythonizer animation is
drawn you can click on the only Larch tree that is visible and the door
will pop up in the lower left corner. The other way to find the door is to
click on the Meat Head Grinder to start him and the music. Then with your
mouse pointer scan the lower left corner.
- Once the maze starts up you will fall off the track and into the sea!! A
sign will appear with the words, "SPACE BAR" on it. When the sign stops
swinging push the space bar on your keyboard. You will now be on a lift
which will take you back to the maze, and will be on the letter "M". Turn
around and go: Right, Right, Left, Left,Right, Right, Left, Left, turn
around and take this lift down. This lift will take you for a ride down and
then back up, but you will end up at the left middle side of the "H". Now
go Right, Right, Left, Straight, Left, Right, Right, Left, Straight, Left,
Turn around. You are now on the lower right of the letter "D". You will see
a lift, take it down. This lift has taken you to the middle of the "G" Go:
Right, Right, Left, Left. You have now entered déjà vu, you are going up
the "R". Go Straight, Right, Right, Right, turn around, Straight, Right,
Left, Left. The maze is now stuck, just keep clicking on it to get it
started again. Now turn around and go: Left, Left, Right, Right, Left, (you
will see an impaled birdman), go Left. The bloody maze is stuck again! Once
again just keep clicking on the track until it starts up. Now turn around
and go: Left, Straight, Straight, Straight, Left. Once again you are in
déjà vu, you are going up the last "R". Go: Straight, Right, Right, Right,
turn around, Straight, Right. This maze just keeps getting stuck, keeping
clicking. When it starts up again you will get the Trivia Questions. [see
- Things are a real drag now. You have four icons as your clues. You are
going to play Spot the Loony around the Meat Head Grinder, so click on him
to start him up. Loonies will pop up around him. You need to spot them in
the same order they appear in the maze. Click on the icon and hold on to it. Now
drag the icon to the top of the Meat Head Grinder and drop it in. Do this
with all four icons.
- You thought you were done, didn't you? Go to the brain, all the lobes are
flashing, so now what do you do? Click on the new brain from Curry's,
that's the new icon in the upper left corner of your screen. Now you get to
play Simon. You remember Simon don't you? It is a game of follow the
leader. The brain will flash different lobes and play some really rude
sounds, you must click on the lobes in the same order. Play the first 3
levels by doing exactly what the brain does. On the fourth level just get
the first lobe right then just click all over the brain until the game is
By the Number
- How many blows on the head does Mrs. Scum receive?
- How many times is the dead parrot beaten against the shop counter?
- What is the number of unsuccessful encyclopedia salesmen?
- How many body sections does the ant have?
- How many years until Ken Shabby gets a brush?
- What is the number of cars at the drive-in?
- How many verses in the Lumberjack song?
- How many Mounties sing the chorus (of the Lumberjack song)?
- How many can can girls are there?
- How many seconds of sex?
- How many people are watching television?
- How many lobes of the brain are there?
- How many explosions are there in the exploding Blue Danube sketch?
- How many Spanish Inquisitors are there?
Complete the Following Phrase
- The first lesson of not being seen is not to ....
- Stand up
- Spam, bacon, sausage, and ....
- I say, anyone for ....
- Your wife... is she a ....
- Spanish ....
- Ee Eecky ....
- Nobody likes a ....
[Note: This is the answer you must use for the game, however, us true
Python fans really know that nobody likes a Clever Dick]
- Man with three ....
- Old Nick the ....
- sea captain
- No time to ....
- Hello ....
- Hold your head and go ....
- What mountain has the biggest tits in the world?
- Mt. Everest
- What is the first word in Storytime?
- What did Rumpletweezer run?
- The Dinky Tinky Shop
- What problem does the Royal Navy have under control?
- What colour is the phone in the agrument clinic?
- Gray or Green ( You can use either answer)
- Who ate the crunchy frog?
- Superintendent Parrot
- What room is the Argument Clinic in?
- Which cheese was eaten by the cat?
- What company makes the best butter?
- What does the Norwegian Blue have?
- Beautiful plumage
- What choir did the Polly Parrot join?
- How does Polly Parrot feel?
- What breed is the killer cat?
- What currency is kept in the fridge?
- French Francs
- What currency is kept in the pyjamas?
- What can be recognized from quite a long way away?
- The Larch
- Name of the contestant that opts for blows on the head.
- Mrs. Scum
- Atilla the Hun's gift to the children.
- Flying banner brand name.
- The Lumberjack never wanted to be this.
- Dirty Vicar's real name.
- Ronald Simms
- Alternative to burning, burying, or dumping.
- Full-time occupation of the cat influenza man.
- Stapling machine
Betty Cat's Walkthrough
Betty Cat's Trivia
From: Betty Cat
I was just at:
It is the Walk Thru for Monty Python's Complete Waste of Time. Maybe you
better check my web site especially these pages:
which I wrote and copyrighted in 1995.